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Showing posts with label Reflections. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Reflections. Show all posts

Sunday, October 21, 2018

October 21, 2018

What Do You Like, Mama?

"What do you like?" my daughter asked me tonight.

"Hiking. Berries. Snuggling with my kids. Walking in the woods.  Reading stories with you..." I rambled on for a minute with a stream of conscious list.

I neglected to state, though, the most important things:

God.

Life.

Love.

You, my child.  And Daddy.  Your siblings.  Our family.  Our friends.

The way God has created each of us with gifts and talents that can guide us to specific purposes in life ... to the way we are to live and share love in this world.

What do I like, my dear child?

The opportunity I have to live my vocation to married life.

I know.  I know.  I don't always live it well, but I am ever grateful for each bit of grace and mercy extended to me as I live my calling as wife and mom.

One day, dear child, when you have grown and moved through the process of recognizing your own vocation, I pray you are just as grateful.

Married. Single. Religious. Ordained. Whatever life you and your brothers may be called to, may you each live it with love, knowing always, Mama loves you and thanks God every day for gifting me our family.

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Sunday, September 16, 2018

An Open Letter to Discouraged Mamas
September 16, 2018

An Open Letter to Discouraged Mamas

Dear Mama,

Have you had a difficult day?  A challenging night?

Have you wondered why God gifted you a husband and children, when you are apparently are ill-equipped to effectively fill your calling as wife and mom?

So much undone, right?  So many people and things needing your attention...  So little energy or patience left for any of it.

Yep, I've been there.

Are you tired? Worn?  Depleted? Discouraged?

Perhaps even frustrated and a bit angry?

Have you ever felt that there is too much to do and too little day to do it in?  Too many things and people needing your attention and not enough of you to go around? Much less enough of you to do so and to get a sound portion of sleep.

Do you ever just feel like, I simply cannot do all this by myself anymore?

Well... you're right.  You cannot.

And you don't need to.  The Lord God is your help.

Pause. 

Pray. 

Cry if you need to, but as you do, cry out to Him. Ask Him to help.

Give everything over to Him, confident that in your distress and sorrow you can call upon His name.  He is gracious and merciful and is there waiting for you.

Mama, trust me on this.  You are not alone.  I've been in a similar spot as you and I can attest: He is there - even amidst the mayhem of motherhood.

Perhaps especially amidst it.

He is wise and loving.

He knows everything you need, and, sometimes, all you need is a deep breath and a reset.

So, go on.  B-r-ea-the. 

Again.

Ask Him to fill you with grace and strength.

B-r-ea-the.

Again.

Thank Him for loving you and entrusting you with so much.

B-r-ea-the.

Again.

Ask Him to cast evil away from you and to restore you.

Thank Him for all the blessings in your life... For all the things vying for your attention... For all the people you are surrounded by daily.  Especially those you may be most exasperated with...

Thank Him for the very things you are discouraged about, frustrated by, feeling hopeless about... 

He puts nothing and no one in your life without equipping you to deal with it - and to do so with supernatural strength.

That's right, Mama.  Supernatural.  Not Super Mama strength.

Count on it.

And br-ea-the.

Again.

Pray.  Ask to be filled with His strength.

Recognize joy does not always equate to outward happiness and that even when carrying crosses, joy can exist.

Tap into that joy again, Mama.

Let it permeate you. Let it seep past every bit of negativity you may still be feeling and fill you.

Be filled with gratitude. With grace. With giving things over and offering them up.

Then, if there still remains a proverbial cross is in front of you, just pick it up.  Take it and Follow Him. 

That may be all you can do today, and it is enough. It is a path to holiness. 

Yes, embracing your cross of the day as you follow Him.  THAT is enough.

Just to trust.  Just to share in His love.  Just to depend on his mercy.  Just to take a step forward.

It's enough.

Oh, Mama, you may want to, but you simply can't do everything.  But you can can do one thing - follow Him.

Choose to do that in this moment.

Christ will strengthen you.  I know this to be true. 

Br-ea-the.  Trust.  Love.

With love and prayers, 

A Mama Who's Been There
(maybe like five minutes ago)

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Sunday, July 8, 2018

July 08, 2018

When Christ Consoles through A Child and a Liturgical Shelf



Have you ever had a day when you're just emotionally off?  You know, the kind of day when someone seems to have turned the faucets in your eyes onto "leak at a moment's notice"? 

I had just that sort of day the other day, and, oddly, our July liturgical shelf  helped move me from sadness to smiles.




At one point during my "off" day, my daughter noticed silent tears slipping from my eyes and came to give me a concerned hug.  I thanked her and reassured her that nothing had happened to anyone, that I was not sad nor angry with her or her brothers, and that Mommy just woke with many emotions and needed to release them.

My daughter accepted that, gave me another hug, and, then, sat down quietly next to me, where she sang happily in an attempt, I am sure, to keep her empathetic self cheerful and to cheer me as well. 

A moment later, my daughter glanced at our July liturgical shelf, called to her brothers, and asked them to help her.  





Together, they began praying An Offering of the Precious Blood for Souls.  I joined them through my tears, and, as they each took a small, tear-shaped piece of tissue paper "blood" to place in the chalice at Jesus' feet, a grateful smile caught a tear that slipped down my cheek.





Christ offered such a sacrifice for all of us and continually offers each us consolation... mercy... hope.

Following Him, we can offer up our own struggles, no matter what they are.

I know this, of course, but, while stewing in my sadness the other day, I had forgotten to turn my sorrow into something beautiful and worthwhile by offering it up.

Then, Christ sent my children to remind me.

Little did I know a few days prior when my children and I had put together our simple July liturgical shelf as a way of teaching them about our faith that it would become a vehicle for Christ to reach me during a moment of sadness.

He truly works in wonderful ways.

I pray His ways reach you during your next moment of sadness, too.
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Sunday, May 13, 2018

May 13, 2018

Mama Tired... and Blessed

This mama is tired.

Proud tired...



(...after directing my children and their castmates in a performance this past Friday night.)

Hopeful tired...


(...for that nasty cyst on my girlie's neck, which has been causing so much concern will finally be surgically removed - once and for all, we pray - this coming week.  Your prayers are welcome for this intention!)

Blessed tired...



(...after witnessing this boy who finally got to make his First Holy Communion and was truly beaming from it!)

Grateful tired...


(...recognizing how these three beloved gifts are growing.)

For this was just three years ago...


...and four.  


Seriously... Where does the time go?!?


And how many precious moments slip by when we are tired without us recognizing the amazing grace bestowed on us?

Too many, perhaps.

But, not this one.

Not this very present moment when I sit here looking back at a crazy busy (but blessed!) weekend and ahead at a somewhat concerning (but still surely blessed) week, recognizing God's hand in it all. 
The triumphs, the trials, the joys, the just-make-it-through moments.  Each is precious and wrapped in God's merciful love.

Ah, yes, tonight I may be tired.  Mama tired.  The kind of physical, mental, and emotional tired that is born of the ups and downs of life with children.  But, I am also refreshed.  Truly and ultimately refreshed by the wellspring of love and mercy that I know is there for me - and for you!

Our Lord is so generous in His love and mercy.  How awesome is that!?!

If you are tired, too, may you be able to close your eyes, take a deep breath, and be refreshed by the amazing love of God!
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Sunday, April 29, 2018

April 29, 2018

4 Things to Take Home from a Retreat

This weekend I did something I've never done since becoming a Mom: I went away on a retreat: the first annual Catholics Online retreat hosted at the picturesque Mount St. Mary's Abbey, home of a beautiful community of Cisterican nuns and the delicious Trappistine Quality Candy they make.



training happy hearts


At the end of the retreat, as I sat quietly for a moment in one of the beautifully appointed, yet oh so comfortable, sitting rooms of the McMahon Retreat House, I looked across the room and saw this vignette.


Peace




Immediately, my eyes were drawn to a statue of Mary that reached out to me from a corner table.  I gazed at it for some moments and, then, closed my eyes seeing Mama Mary - so pure, so gentle, hands folded in prayer, a gentle smile playing on her lips as she emanated peace.  

I thought to myself how lucky we all are to have Mary, our Mother, Queen of Heaven, praying for us, doling out graces, compelling us to model after her ready “yes” and her abundant love. 
I recognized how Our Lady guides me in my own motherhood and how important it is for me, as a mother, to take quiet moments like the one I was in the midst of to allow myself to be refreshed, basking in God’s divine love.

I knew one gift I would leave the retreat with - peace.


Sacrifice




My eyes then fell to a light that sat below the statue of Mary: a simple one with a cross design that reminded me of Christ and his sacrifice for us while also pointing my thoughts towards the Resurrection. Jesus Christ gone for the cross, risen, and loving us for all eternity.  

In gratitude I sat, thanking God for his mercy and for the hope he offers to each of us every single day if we just turn towards him.  I also thought of the enormous sacrifice he made for us and the small sacrifices my family made which allowed me to go on the retreat.

I wondered what sacrifices I might be called to make in the coming week - and knew I was going home with a heart welling to make them.

Growth



Finally, my eyes moved towards a vase of flowers.  On the vase was painted a simple blooming branch with a yellow-bellied, orange-capped bird on it – open mouthed,  singing with the glory of God, echoing with delight at all the Creator blesses us with.

As beautiful as the birdsong I was hearing in mind was were the flowers that burst with joy from the mouth of vase.  Some were just budding, others were open in their full glory.  Each held individual interest and - together - their collective beauty was striking.

As I gazed at the flowers, I thought of each of the speakers and participants of the retreat weekend that I had been blessed to spend time with throughout the weekend.  Each brought unique talent or stories to share; each had made sacrifices to be a part of the retreat; and, all, I prayed, would be returning home filled with a renewed spirit to balance home life and a desire to go out into the world sharing talents serving the Lord through joyful and consistent work. 
Then, I thought about the individuals I was going home to – my children and my husband.  Each growing with unique gifts.  Each inviting me to grow as a wife and mother.

Chocolate





With the gifts of internal peace, a willingness to sacrifice, and a desire to grow tucked into my heart, I left the sitting room of the McMahon House and went to rejoin others for the final hour of our retreat.  Then, as I put my things in my minivan to take home, I made sure to tuck in some physical gifts, too - chocolate!

The nuns at the the abbey make the most delicious chocolate which can buy in their gift shop or order online to enjoy. My children have already devoured all the chocolate I brought home!

Peace, sacrifice, growth... chocolate!  These are all gifts I brought home from my weekend retreat.  What gifts have you received this weekend and what can you gift forward?
 <
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Sunday, March 25, 2018

March 25, 2018

Have You Asked Your Child to Narrate His First Holy Communion Banner {and Been Pleased that Your Child Is "Getting" Holy Week, Too)?

Is your little one making a First Holy Communion banner this year? 



If so, I encourage you to ask your child why he chose to design it the way he did.  Doing so can provide wonderful insight into your child's understanding of his faith.  I know did for me!

Since today was "Banner Day" in my youngest's First Holy Communion class, last night my son asked his big sister to quick-sketch his ideas for his banner as he described them to her. 




Then, my son set to work making his banner with her help and mine.


When my son finished gluing on each design part, he held his design up proudly.


Then, he went to work using glitter glue to add his name and a few design details.


Finally, he explained the symbolism of his finished banner to me:

This is my banner.  Why I have the cross is in the middle is to represent that Jesus dies for us to make up for our sins.  I put the host and wine, because I wanted to represent that God's time is all at once, and ,when He died for us then, for Him it is now, too.  He shed His blood for us and gave us the Eucharist across time so we can be strengthened in our faith. 
I have a heart at the top to show Jesus' love for us.  The gold is because Jesus is so rich in love. 
My name is in blue to represent our Mother Mary, because it is her color.  It also represents the water - some of the miracles of Jesus - and the sky for heaven.  Why I have the yellow is because its represent our Lord Jesus' cross shining.  When we receive the Eucharist, we shine with Christ's love and faith.

My son was too shy to offer the explanation of his design's symbolism in front of his whole class this morning, but he said I can share it here to inspire you to ask your child for a personal First Holy Communion Banner narration. 

Surely, having my son narrate the why behind each of his design choices illuminated for me his current understanding of the Eucharist.  Coincidentally, it also helped me recognize that he is "getting" the significance of the Triduum and how Christ's sacrifice at Calvary connects to the sacrifice of the Mass.  

The Last Supper, the Crucifixion, the Resurrection, our invitation to participate in the sacrifice of the Mass.  May we each connect the dots and grow in faith and love, strengthened by our Lord.


Also, may God bless all children preparing for First Holy Communion, guiding them to a deep and beautiful understanding of faith and an unwavering desire to receive our Lord in the Eucharist.
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Sunday, February 11, 2018

When (Involuntary) Penances Begin before Lent (Or, Why No Regular Post This Sunday)
February 11, 2018

When (Involuntary) Penances Begin before Lent (Or, Why No Regular Post This Sunday)

Picture three children, laying feverish on an air mattress on a living room floor.  

Now, picture a mom laying on a couch.  

Now, picture a Mom and son laying together in the dark unable to turn an electric light on.

You have just pictured the last two weeks of our lives here. 

Abut two weeks ago my daughter went down with a fever and her siblings soon followed.  Their fevers were high and their energy low, but they were champs as Daddy and I nursed them back to health - and, before a week was out, they were fever free.

Still, I kept us quarantined just to ensure that we would not pass on any unwanted germ gifts to others, for I had heard this year's bug is contagious from one day prior to symptoms until three days or so after the first symptom appears.  Thus, I wanted to be certain that my children were free and clear - and that I was not going to get hit - before venturing out.

When what I thought was our safe "greenlight" day came, out we went for a few hours and... BOOM!  That very night I got hit with something.  

That something brought fevers, chills, and lethargy like my children had had, but also persisted after fevers abated with persistent lightheadnedness and other symptoms that only I seem to suffer from.  These symptoms did not debilitate me completely, but sure have been making doing anything on my feet for more than 15 minutes or so difficult, which is not fun and is also not conducive to homeschool mothering. 

Praise God, then, for relatively good kids, a committed husband, and plenty of prayers from friends and family this past week. Without them, the week would have been a disaster.  Also, props to God for reminding me that sometimes, all you can do is laugh.

In fact, the wee hours of this morning found me in the midst of a comedy of errors that made me do just that - well, after moments of concern, disgust, and frustration passed.

You see, in the middle of the night, our electricity suddenly went out.  While we were in the dark, my oldest son woke up and got scared.  I heard him immediately, and called to him to explain that the lights were out and he could follow the flashlight beam to me if he needed comfort.  He did an fell onto the couch next to me n a heap. 

I stroked his hair and back and said, "Buddy, it's okay.  Did you have a bad dream? I bet waking up to such darkness really scared you. Mama's here, though.  He looked at me, face twisted, and said, "I don't feel well."  I told him he was probably just scared.  Mama was with him.  It would be okay.

For a minute, my son began to quiet, but, then, he got up and raced to the bathroom thinking he might be sick.  But,no, he was okay.

When my son returned to me, I hugged him and said, "Maybe you're just anxious, buddy.  Sit with, Mama.  You'll be okay."  he did, but,then, got up and stumbled through the darkness to the bathroom again.  This time he did get sick, and, unfortunately, did not make it to the toilet.  But, at least he was able to find the sink.

So, then, as my son sat on the bathroom floor debating if he was going to have another bout of sickness, I found myself, standing, lightheaded, trying to clean and unclog the sink using just a tiny stream of flashlight to tackle the task by.  Thankfully, as I was finishing the rather disgusting job, my husband awoke and helped me arrange a sick bed for my son- all by flashlight beam, of course. 

As I tucked my son in gave him a new blessing, and kissed his forehead in the dark, I could not help but to laugh.  Boy down.  Mama down.  Lights down.  But, spirit not down. 

These involuntary penances have a purpose, I am certain.  If we offer them up, they can be used for good.  And, so, even as we move from week two to week three of sickness here, I am grateful.

All things work together for good - even electric outages and sickness - and most certainly prayers and support.

However your Lenten journey begins this year, may love and prayers be pervasive.
 
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Sunday, December 3, 2017

December 03, 2017

When Preparing to Prepare Pays Off...




Advent
A season of joyful waiting
      of (sometimes) quiet anticipation
               of prayer
                         of penance
                                    and of preparation 
  as we ready our hearts and homes to celebrate 
       the commemoration of Jesus' arrival in the manger 
       in Bethlehem
               His coming again at some point in the future
                          and our every day opportunities 
                          to embrace encounters with Him 
                          in our interactions with others 
                          and as recipients of immeasurably grace.


Last night before bed I readied our home for this beautiful liturgical season by cleaning and organizing parts of our house before setting out supplies for some of our family's Advent traditions. 

Then, today, as my children delighted in each tradition, I smiled with gratitude and joy.  My efforts to prepare paid off with warm memories in the making that focused us on faith.

Among other things, a basket of instruments...





...had us ringing in the New Liturgical Year!



{Disclosure: Some of the links which follow are affiliate ones.  Should you click through them and make any purchase, we may receive compensation at no extra cost to you.}

Our Nativity Playset...




...brought squeals of "I remember that..." and immediate unfolding of play.



Our Advent Chains...


...enticed eager hands to begin our Christmas countdown, and, later, inspired all of our hands to set to writing out notes for our first Advent Chain Work of Mercy for this season and to fixing food for one another. 


And, yes, this year we do have TWO Advent Chains, because one child wanted to create a personal mini-one.


I am all for self-starters who seek to spread more love and kindness while preparing for coming of Christ.


A table set for the first day of the Liturgical New Year prompted the children to begin filling "Jesus' manger" with hay when they made small sacrifices.  It also invited them to offer coins for a local Respect Life concern.  (We no longer Count, Pray, and Give with the annual Baby Bottle campaign, since the children have grown out of that, but we still eagerly do the giving.  In fact, the children were excited this past Friday after Holy Hour and Mass to see the baby bottles out and could not wait to take one home!)


Because it is not Christmas yet, many of our nativity sets are not in their full glory  Instead, on our table Joseph was sleep "at home" and Mary was hearing God's plan from the angel Gabriel.  This reminded the children of Bible history and also prompted them to remember our Star from Afar, which we use a little differently. Thus, throughout the day, they kept their eyes pealed for the star among a mess that we could fix.


My daughter found it and is eager to have us all clean where it was tomorrow so she can re-hide the star in another part of our home that needs help.  (There are plenty of those!)


The living room table, thankfully, is not one of them.  Instead, last night, I cleaned it and, then, set supplies on it.  So, this morning the children were excited to discover our Works of Mercy Wisemen back in action there reading not one, but THREE books to inspire us.


Minutes later, the Wise Men were "whispering" in ears about how we could actively prepare our hearts for Our Lord through action today, remembering The Christmas Story and thinking about what the world would be like If He Had not Come. 


The books also offered us a cozy read together time later in the day.

In afternoon, spotting our Advent Wreath with a Jesse Tree ornament inside reminded the children we still needed a branch to serve as our Jesse Tree.



So out into the woods we went to find one...


Later, after reading related Old and new Testament verses for the day, as well as the book Genesis, my youngest hung our first ornament.


He was also thrilled to have it be his turn to light the Advent wreath.



And I was equally delighted with the rapt attention and occasional laughter our first candlelight reading from Bartholomew's Passage brought.


Read togethers, our St. Andrew Novena, our Jesse Tree, Advent Wreath time, and bedtime blessings sure made a beautifully blessed close to our day for the children and me.

Now, before my own bedtime as I reflect on our day, I think about how much faith, fun, and family time were shared due to relatively simple preparations in our home.  I also imagine how much more amazing the results of preparing our hearts will be.



Already, blessings and grace are apparent in this life - some causing us to literally sing out with joy.  Envision how much more abundant they may be one day if we stand in Our Lord's presence in Heaven.  It's almost impossible to conceive the rapture.

Truly, if preparing some things around the house brings moments of joy, peace, and prayer to the present, imagine what preparing our hearts can do for eternity?


May each of our preparations this season pay off in joy here as a foretaste to triumph that awaits us if we keep welcoming Jesus into our hearts and extending His love to those around us.
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Sunday, July 30, 2017

July 30, 2017

A Call to Love


A while back, I shared a reflection about When Divine Mercy Intervenes with Parenting a Preteen.  In it, I shared several prayers that my oldest child had written.  That boy continues to create written prayers during many of the weekly quiet times that we experience as a part of Holy Hour.

His sister, on the other hand, does not often write during Holy Hour.  Instead, she sings the Divine Mercy prayers with a radiant smile, and, then, often, during the time for quiet prayers, can be found sketching with her lips silently moving.

When I glance over at my daughter, intent on sketching what she sees around the church, her lips moving in silent conversation, I smile and give thanks to God for the gift that she is. 


She is a child who loves to sing His praise and to open her Bible to read His word. 


She is also shyest, most sensitive child, yet she is also a child who is vibrant in her own ways. 

In crowds and new situations, my daughter can often be found clinging to my side, silent, but intently listening and observing, and, often, later, chatting with me about what she has heard and witnessed.  When she is comfortable with those around her, she is animated - on the move, offering vivacious smiles, being as compassionate and helpful as she is imaginative and active.  At home, my daughter vacillates between being a crazy, kinesthetic kid and a contemplative, quiet one. 

Yes, my girl is both pensive and playful, reflective and rearing to go! Thus, it comes as no surprise to me that my daughter's preferred way of reflecting and praying during Holy Hour is by gazing at the altar, sketching and thinking while quietly conversing with Jesus.

Observing my daughter in such quiet moments of sketching, thought, and prayer - as well as during both the sung and spoken prayers during Holy Hour - I give thanks to God and am sometimes moved to tears. 


What an observant, sensitive, beautiful child He has gifted me to steward.  Like all children, she has her own gifts and challenges and, for one reason or another, God has decided that I am the perfect mother for her, my husband is the perfect father, and her brothers are the perfect siblings.  Not perfect, mind you as people, but perfectly chosen by Him to be a family - to help one another grow in strength, wisdom, faith, and hope.

Likewise, our local parish collaborative family, I know, is the result of people coming together in response to God's call.  And our larger community is made up of people God places in proximity for a purpose.  And on and on in concentric widening circles of souls that God has granted the opportunity of coming together as conduits of His love and mercy.

It occurs to me that while we each are unique and have free will, we also each have a common purpose and call - to embrace His love and mercy and to share it with one another.  In our communities, in our families, in our one-to-one relationships with one another and with Him.


As I glance at my daughter during Holy Hour and then look back to Jesus on the altar, I give thanks for the way He converses with our souls, for His love, for His mercy, and for His wisdom.  I think about the responsibility He has entrusted me with and pray for the grace and strength to live well as a mother to my children, an individual in my community, and a child of God. 

Then, I reach over to my daughter's forearm, gently squeezing it three times in a silent "secret" message we have shared for years: I. Love. You.  She smiles, take my hand and squeezes back:  I. Love. You.  May she always know how much I love her.  May she always know how much Our Lord does.  And, may she always be so willing to share love.



May we all.

Yes, today, and every day, may love be what we reach out and respond with. 


How is Our Lord conversing with your soul today and who is He calling you to express love to?

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